I look at self as the only constant thing in one's life, the others are always subject to change. Hence, things that are constant or permanent need to be taken care of. They need to be tended to. Here is where self care comes into picture. Self care is taking care of your body and mind. When it comes to the 'mind' part, there's a part of self care which includes being good to yourself.
Being good to yourself, according to me is an overlooked, underrated part of people's lifestyle; a habit which needs to be inculcated by everyone. 'Being good to yourself' is a subjective notion and can mean differently to everyone, as it should.
To some, its the most basic part of self care, to some its about achieving their goals, to some its nurturing, to others its self-compassion. The very idea of being good to yourself encompasses all of these ideas. We often tend to fall prey to negative thoughts, self-criticism, punishments and self-loathing when we make a mistake or go morally wrong. At such times, we tend to forget that to err is human and the very fact that we as humans are supposed to be flawed.
In this apparently cruel world out there, we are easily put down by comparisons and competitions. We are smitten by the idea of our ideal selves and we tend to be disappointed when we fail to reach there. We forget that coming close to that point of our ideal selves is a long process and cannot be achieved in a short period of time.
Practising self care, being good to ourselves is what saves us during these times. Life is difficult sometimes and we do make mistakes. Times can be bad and some things do not go as planned. And that's okay. We are not meant to handle all things perfectly. We all have our strengths and weaknesses and we cannot be the best in all walks of life. Before being good to ourselves, comes acceptance. Acceptance of our imperfections, of our flaws. Only when we accept, can we process our feelings and forgive ourselves for our wrong doings.
Feelings of guilt, envy, jealousy, inferiority are natural and it is okay to get them once in a while. This idea that we have to be pure and good at all times has been so drilled into us that we cannot look beyond it. Even if we try our best, we are going to have to bear this other side some or the other time. Disappointments, failure, stress, undesirable circumstances are an inevitable part of life and coping with them by means of negativity, self-hate and self-blame is one of the worst ways to go about it. When we accept the possibility of such times and feelings, we can bear to look at it from a fresh, practical angle. Then we can handle the situation better. Attitudes matter at such times.
My point is that self care is about digesting that its okay not be okay and accepting ourselves for ourselves. Only then can we look for areas of improvement in our lives. Every life matters and this life is majorly shaped by the mind that it holds. If minds are tended to, lives would be so much better. Self-care is important and should not be taken lightly.
Be good to yourself. You're worth it.